Unsolicited Investment Advice for Mur

So it appears that Mur has been [laid off by her company right before the holidays](http://www.murlafferty.com/blog/?p=54). Even we non-Christmas-celebrating folks know that *that’s* not right. What a bunch of Scroogey McScroogersons!

Fortunately it sounds like Mur is doing all the right things, which almost as valuable as cold, hard cash. Even better, she has a severance package, which as it turns out is *exactly* as valuable as cold, hard cash.

Now as a [veteran of the Silicon Valley layoff scene](https://www.goer.org/2002/11/riffed.html) (seriously, there’s a scene, with red carpets and paparazzi and everything), I feel qualified to offer Mur some advice. Specifically about that severance package. See, Mur might be tempted to run off and spend that money on something irresponsible, like videogames. In particular, she might be looking at Rock Band Special Edition with guitar, drum set, and microphone. Oh sure, it *sounds* like it would be fun to have a Christmas morning jam session with your husband and daughter, where right as the final chords are fading away, you all extend a Lafferty Family upraised middle finger, “Merry Christmas, you spineless incompetent corporate bastards!”

But think about it — would that actually be *spiritually satisfying*? Would that bond you as a family? I think the question answers itself. Far better to put that money into something responsible. Like T-bills! Or wheat germ!

As an aside, Mur also suggests playing Arkham Horror over the holidays. Once again, I would argue that Cthulhu-based games are insufficiently light-hearted and family-oriented during this time of great crisis and international brou-ha-ha and so forth. To quote Joshua Falken, perhaps the best and most famous game reviewer of all time, “How about a nice game of Quirkle?”

8 thoughts on “Unsolicited Investment Advice for Mur

  1. T-bills? OK, I can buy that, but arkham is lovely and light-hearted if you’re playing A Very Scary Solstice in the background. “here comes Yog-Sothoth, here comes Yog-Sothoth…”

    Thanks, Evan. 🙂

  2. Wait, I missed out on the red carpet? That’s the whole problem with you SiliValley folks, always getting the really good swag and event activities. All I got was a AMT tax bill for toilet-paper level stock options and shown the door.

    And fiddlestix. One thing that really blows my mind is how many companies do this kind of thing days/weeks before the end of the year. A special kind of hell is reserved for them.

    And if we’re playing bad investment advice… Rock Band is ridiculously fun. I have the blisters to prove it.

  3. Wait, I missed out on the red carpet? That’s the whole problem with you SiliValley folks, always getting the really good swag and event activities. All I got was a AMT tax bill for toilet-paper level stock options and shown the door.

    And fiddlestix. One thing that really blows my mind is how many companies do this kind of thing days/weeks before the end of the year. A special kind of hell is reserved for them.

    And if we’re playing bad investment advice… Rock Band is ridiculously fun. I have the blisters to prove it.

    We won’t mention the attempt to play lead vocals. I think my showing as Ophelia was clear enough evidence of my singing capabilities.

  4. And here I got laid off just before Thanksgiving.

    But then, I was trying to quit anyways, so being handed five figures on the way out the door was not at all objectionable…

    Personally, I put about a third of that into the joint (between me and Xta) “can has house plz?” fund. A third will go to general living expenses to hold down my debt over the next semester. And the other third will be going to a sooper seekrit special purpose, to be announced a later date.

  5. You know what they say: once you’ve been exposed to Old One’s caroling songs, you’ll never be able to get them out of your head.

    The above double comment was also mine. the goer.org gremlins do not like me.

  6. It’s okay, they pretty much hate everyone, really. That was the main qualification for the job. Yes, we have a screening process here.

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