Remember those giant communist spiders I was worried about? Okay, I haven’t, like, done a scientific study or anything… but it seems to me that as the summer draws to a close, there are definitely fewer communist spiders, but the ones that remain are larger and fatter and just plain wickeder than ever.
Nature frightens me.
In other, related scary Nature news, my cousin Auros points out this NY Times article about arthropod sexual cannibalism. As my cousin put it, “Well, when het marriage involves having your innards literally liquified and sucked out of your body, the gay agenda starts to sound rather appealing.” Hmmm. Somewhere there’s an old-school vaudeville-style joke about alimony or something in there… but I’m just not in touch enough with my inner Shecky Greene to make it happen. Hey, look, I’m a lamp! Take my wife, please! Eh.
These spiders are outside, where Nature intended them to be. However, in the interest of arachnophobes everywhere confronted by the dreaded spider on the ceiling, a tip from Evan’s mom: The vacuum cleaner crevice tool (the long skinny tube)– attached to a running vacuum cleaner, of course — makes an efficient, no-risk disposal device, that is, until such time as one has children who insist that the poor thing not be killed but removed outdoors.
Henci AKA Mom
If at some point I have children, and if at some point these children start insisting that the poor thing be removed outdoors, then said children can darn well learn to remove the spider themselves!