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Commercials We'd Like To See

Ever wonder how carnivorous aliens can devour humans without getting sick, even though they have totally different biochemistries? Well, Steve Eley has the answer:

"Dessert?"

"Oh, no, thank you. I'm chordate intolerant."

"So am I. Have you tried Terranex?"

"Terranex? What's that?"

"It's the new supplement for Earth invaders with sensitive thoracic cavities like ours. It breaks down those complex protein chains so your body doesn't have to!"

"I had no idea!"

"For best results, Terranex should be taken every solar cycle. Side effects may include headaches, nausea, or the sudden transformation into a half-human hybrid consumed by inexplicable angst and intent on the destruction of your own race. If irritation persists, please see your geneticist. Now...how about an entertainment lawyer?"

"I'll take two!" [laughter] "THANKS, TERRANEX!"

Posted by Evan Goer on May. 23, 2005 at 11:14 PM | Comments (1)

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