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Evan's Sense of Snow

The Florida vote count is in. Looks like by any criteria you choose, Bush would have barely won, unless you hand-count the entire state, in which case Gore edges him out.

Two conclusions that spring to mind:

• If Bush had accepted Gore's criteria (just count the four disputed Democratic counties), Bush would have emerged victorious. On the other hand, if Gore had not played it too-clever-by-half, and instead insisted on counting the entire state, he would have won. Conclusion: both men were chicken-shits.

• The election was decided by a margin of a few hundred votes. The total number of votes was on the order of a hundred million. To determine the results accurately, our measuring devices would have had to get the count right to better than one part in a million. Conclusion: If you want accurate measurements, A) think carefully about the parameters of your experiment and B) be prepared to shell out for some better hardware.

Anyway. It looks like I've managed to annoy M'ris. I should have known better. Marissa has been fighting the good fight, defending the Midwest against all snooty East Coast and West Coast comers... it was only a matter of time before I got caught in the crossfire. Just a flip comment about "visiting snow". Damn.

As far as I can tell, the reasoning goes something like this:

1. Evan said he likes to visit snow, but afterwards, he likes to go home where there is no snow.
2. The Midwest has snow.
3. Therefore, Evan's opinion of the Midwest is, at best: "Nice place to visit, wouldn't want to live there."

Which is actually not that far off from the truth, although I certainly don't single out the Midwest in that respect. The Midwest absolutely seems like a fine place to live. As far as I can tell, there are plenty of interesting things to do and people to meet over there. But right now, I'd rather not live there. California suits me just fine. Others have said this far better, really.

Marissa points out that when you're used to snow, it changes your food, clothes, leisure activities, and thought processes. Kewl. So does living in a Mediterranean climate. She also mentions there's a kind of "sharpening," an "intensity to January" that I am missing out on. Yup! Okay by me.

And then, out of nowhere, she gets it all wrong:

Visiting snow is like saying, "Oh, I'll spend the weekend in Atlanta, and then I'll know all about those wacky Southern families." It just doesn't work that way.

No, no, no. How to say this...? I don't visit the snow so I can draw uninformed conclusions about Midwestern culture. I visit the snow to throw around a few snowballs. Maybe ski a bit. I don't take snow seriously. I can even go years without it. For me, Snow is Just For Fun. That's all.

On a related note, I did spend a few minutes scanning her text for a hint of the old "weather wimp" argument. You know, the one that goes, "Pu-ny Californ-ian! That which does not kill you, makes you stronger!" Usually punctuated with a hearty "YEAARGH!!" and the waving of battleaxes. However, though the needle on the detector moved a bit, the results were negative. So she managed to narrowly avoid pushing one of my buttons. Nimble as always.

Posted by Evan Goer on Nov. 12, 2001 at 2:52 PM